I don’t have time to write!
And now I’m thinking of just giving up…
Welcome or welcome back! On to episode four! If you’d like to hear me read this, then click here: (Music by FASSounds and John_Kensy_Music from Pixabay.)
4 minute read
We have identified ourselves as a writer and have some ideas about the qualities and attitudes needed to maintain that identity. But what is a writer if they’re not writing? With the pressures of modern life and juggling demands and expectations from 360 degrees, it may feel nigh impossible to fit writing in.
When I get wrapped up in my 9 to 5, running a business and navigating everything else life throws at me, I begin to doubt my commitment to writing. Is this really what I want to do? If it is, then why am I doing everything else but writing? Cue an avalanche of distractions: Netflix bingeing (well you can’t have a conversation with anyone at work unless you’re watching the latest ‘in’ series), social media distractions (yet another cat video), household chores because your name isn’t Snow White and you don’t have all those woodland animals in servitude, and so on.
It can become a vicious circle. I struggle with the balance of structure. Too much and I feel trapped, suffocated and restricted. Too little and nothing gets done then I beat myself about not getting anything done. I am working on finding the Goldilocks balance for structure - so that it is just right for me. That is the key, it needs to be just right for you. Try different things and see what works.
My relationship with time is a work in progress and ever evolving. I sit under the cloud of the assumption that Black people are always late, so I feel obligated to buck that trend. My mum was always a stickler for time. If I was tasked to pick her up and not there by one minute after then my phone would start blowing up. It is like living with an internal pressure cooker waiting to blow.
I try really hard not to let time control me. If I am running late, I just accept that there is nothing I can do about it now and every decision I have made has had consequences. That extra ten minutes in bed, five minutes on Instagram, two minutes on TikTok that turned into half an hour? All come with consequences.
I often get frustrated with time running out, but it’s like complaining about having a walk on suitcase, (you know the type that has to fit in that overhead locker) that try as you might just cannot fit in: your full summer wardrobe, complete library of books, exercise equipment, make up counter from Boots and all the pairs of trainers you’ve ever owned! We try to fit too much in. Obviously some things need to be left out. They don’t have to be left out forever; they can be carried on another trip, another time. Other ‘things’ must be thrown away or should never have been purchased. Not only do we need to let go of them, but we need to let go of the shame around purchasing them (or giving our time to them) in the first place. Perhaps at that point in time we had convinced ourselves that we really needed it. Please let’s not beat ourselves up about perceived waste or lack. We work with what we have. Use a kind eye and look at things in truth and fairness.
I read an Instagram post (@Shona_Vertue) about underestimating ourselves. It was related to fitness goals. Shona suggested that instead of setting a goal around exercising four times a week, maybe we start with getting our gym gear on, turning up at the gym and spending five minutes on the bike (or something similar, I can’t remember this verbatim but you get the idea). This advice mirrors advice I give to colleagues when their desired outcome is something big. Go for the quick win first. Build up that sense of accomplishment and achievement so we feel good. Setting our selves up to fail can lead to a downward spiral.
We need space. Space to breathe, to connect, to ground, to be our true authentic selves and to create!
The takeaway: Don’t let time be the shackles to your creativity. Explore what works for you. Try different tools, approaches and strategies. Let go of other people’s expectations - you will be surprised at how much they might be affecting your mindset. Here are some books to explore:
Stolen Focus: Why you can’t pay attention by Johann Hari
Indistractable: How to control your attention and choose life by Nir Eyal
The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron (this has a great exercise in chapter two, page 57 around exploring how you spend your time)
Next time: Missing: The Niche Who Wouldn’t Come in From the Cold
Click here to find more from me.
Listen to the poem here:
Take a glance Back over your shoulder Look how far you have come Look how high up you are See the view Take it all in You made it You know You feel it That joy The ecstasy of being Doing the thing that Has you smiling and laughing And excited And hungry for more And wanting to tell everyone And share The fact You have found The holy grail Of you And loving you Gratitude abound Peace throughout Joy overflowing All hail the light. ©2022 Sarah Elliott Taken from my book Warrior Wisdom Sun - click to order
It honestly feels like that sometimes, I love writing but it’s like I don’t do it enough 😭